Once upon a time, as the story often goes, the noble prince must travel a far journey to rescue the princess from her tower and fight a mighty dragon in the process. He trains vigilantly and prepares himself. He goes into battle, brave, and with confidence that he will slay the dragon and will rescue the princess. He also does this at whatever cost. We see this story played out in fairy tales numerous times. It often shows the prince or noble knight almost killed in the process but makes a valiant comeback to save the day. He had a goal and focused on completing it. He never had another option worth exploring but to go after his desire, the princess. Do you think he would have taken a Plan B given the option? Would he have just settled for the handmaiden rather than go after what he was supposed to obtain?
Much also like my 3 year old daughter. I have endlessly been working with her to potty train her. It was going well and she would rarely soil her pull up. The last week or so she became very, lazy I suppose for lack of a better word. I was cleaning up more poop and dirty pull ups than I had since we switched to them from diapers. I came to the point of realizing she was starting to settle. She knew she could do whatever she wanted and not have to visit the bathroom if she wore a pull up. The pull-ups were her plan B. As long as I was willing to change those poopy pull ups, she didn't see a reason to stop doing her business in them. Once I realized this, this completely changed the game. After the 3rd poopy pull-up that she brought and handed to me, as you can imagine, making quite a mess, I was done. I cleaned her up, put underwear on her and told her no more, that if she had to go to the bathroom, she needs to visit the potty. (I knew by working with her this long and seeing how well she had done in panties that she was ready, I feel I should side note that I wasn't forcing her before she was able).
Guess what? Not a single accident or mess since then. It would seem like a miracle except it was a matter of taking away her plan B. Taking away her crutch.
I am barely a millennial, on the cusp of the gen Yer's I think. I am not knowledgeable enough about what they called us but it was after Gen Xers. Regardless, we have always been taught, "Go after your dreams, but keep in mind and solidify that plan B just in case it doesn't work out like you hope." Throughout my life it has seemed like good advice. A safety net sounds like the perfect thing to have when you are on a high balance beam. The problem is that many of us settled in our plan B. We worked so hard to get a solid plan B that we never really reached past to what our Plan A goals were. Now for some, they love their plan B and enjoy that path. I feel there are others, (myself included) that relied too much on that Plan B and because I was, well, lazy for a lack of better word, I sat in my soiled pull-up while everyone around me was moving on. Now I sit in my beautiful safety net I created, (because lets face it the imagery is much better than me in a soiled pull-up) but it means nothing if I don't get on the balance beam and see what I can do.
Its going to take some work, but I am going to try and eliminate some plan B's from my life. Things that should have been a safety net have merely held me back from pushing to get what I wanted. Had I not had a net to fall in, I might be living the Plan A I always dreamed of. Maybe not. Does anyone really know? Its like sink or swim. You will survive or you will drown, but as long as you wear a lifevest, you may never really learn how to safe yourself.
Think about this the next time you don't have enough money to invest in your dream, or when you don't have enough time to start that project you've wanted to for so long. Stop settling for average and marginal when you were created for so much more.
I know I was, so I'm going to embrace it. No one said it would be easy, it actually will be the hardest thing you've done, but I know it will be worth it.
Xoxoxox
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